Thursday, February 28, 2008

Its sunny and warm here today in fair Astoria.

Two days in a row now! And to think just two hours ago it was crappy and the sidewalk was wet with what I will assume was rain though I didn't actually see it happen so I can't be sure.

Things have returned back to semi-normal since The Evil King lost his Dear Father. However he hasn't fully grieved what with all the family business that takes place when a family member passes. He is the soul provider for this family and while on the one hand I feel slightly guilty for that, it also maybe whats keeping him from falling completely apart.

You see, I have a morbid sense of death. I don't grieve long and usually the grieving is about how bad those around me feel. I feel sadder for them than over the loss of the dead and the pain I feel is for them. Death is just a start to something new and better and usually an end to something painful or some kind of suffering.

So, heartlessly I forget about the sadness and move on with the living I've been left here to do, because after all what can one do but continue on living? But I forget that others around me are not as good at letting go as I am, how do I help him process his grief? Will it process itself? Like they say, it will just hit you at some point, you'll be driving or online at the grocery store and there it will manifest itself, the grief. The pain of your emotional self finally getting the message, the last one figuratively to get the proverbial phone call.

So I listen, whenever the mood strikes him to tell me...anything, I just listen. I tell him I love him and how he's my favorite boy in the whole world. How I'm so lucky to be loved by him so much and all that that implies. So here's to tomorrow being another sunny day and the pain being a little further away than today.

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

In mourning at the house of Evil...

I had no time to stop for Death...and so it kindly stopped for me.



Monday, February 18, 2008

So yesterday,

My Rock-n-Roll fish truck driver and my two little evil princesses took our selves to Fort Stevens State Park, 'cause they have the awesomest family bike trails in the great N.W. The man and I however do not have bicycles yet, I tried to borrow some from my Mother-in-law who has well alot, but she said "no, let me have them spiffed up first" and I was thinking no problem 'cause my youngest still needs to get the hang of riding a bike.

Well, she's got the hang of it, and it only took her one try! stinking little muffin head. So anyway the four of us went for a walk/ride, the two girls riding there bikes and the two of us walking. It was SO beautiful out there oh my flip. That last bad storm we had that knocked out Astoria for four days pretty much ripped anything that wasn't firmly rooted right out of the ground but they've been cleaning it up and the beauty that the storm left behind makes it worth being without heat and power for so long.

The path was being taken back by the forest by the moss, bright spring green moss. The willow trees are starting to come out and they are right at that stage where their so small and soft. I had to take a wisp of it. The whole place looks like the kind of area that might be inhabited by fairies or some such thing. Every now and then the dog will take after some unseen thing and It makes me wonder what color that fairy was.

And my daughters, who whip the trail and back again on their bikes, riding over far more terrain on our adventure then I or my man are covering on foot. My youngest gets to the little foot bridge that crosses over the big stream and up to the middle we walk, then she gets on her tiny little pink schwinn stardust with the frilly tassles hangin' off the handle bars (can you see it?) and we tell her now make sure to use the brakes so you don't go to fast. Down the hill she goes and she's peddling and peddling and her Dad yells "USE YOUR BRAKES!" and she peddles still.

We get down to the bottom (after I fainted and Alex hauled my ass off the pavement) and ask her "didn't you hear me tell you to use your brakes?" and she says "YA but I didn't want to, I wanted to go faster!" all this with a HUGE grin on her face. That's right scare the Momma, whatever.

Oh funny thing happened on our little walk, this group of mountain bikers ride by us with there dog who looks to be some sort of herd dog and right before it barks and takes a nip at my dog who doesn't act that way one of the guys shouts "it's okay, he's nice" Now whats funny about these people is their all mountain bike geared up, with the fancy spandex outfits and their weird looking aero-dynamic racing style helmets. It looks like some snotty imported "local" had brought some of his even snottier out of towners to do "some serious bike riding dudes" only to find parents walking their little blond girls on pink stardust schwinn's.

They were not amused, I however thought it was damned funny.
served him right his dog made a liar out of him. And by the way mister!! that was NOT the off leash area, have some respect Man. BE NICE OR LEAVE!.

Snipity snip Prince Tybalt


So today is the day that my little kitten who has gone from this.....

To a 13 pound monster who stinks and chases his mother around like she is his would be suitor.

Cats are disgusting, they will try to procreate with there own Mother's. It's very Oedipus, all sick and twisted and shit and I thought humans were bad.

However, my monster cat is very particular about his schedule these days. See I get up at 4:45 a.m. everyday except Sunday with my Man to help get him off to work smoothly. When I appear on the stair case (and this doesn't happen with any other family member) my dog starts doing the happy dance, he lays his ears back and he lays on his Lab eyes feature and starts to thump his tail, not wagging you see but thumping...he bangs his tail on the floor or the chair or what ever he happens to be sitting on. It's the cutest damn thing ever and it means "oh good! your awake, is it time for food? food food food food food food food food food.

About this time the cat seems to hear our movings around and appears outside and begins to throw himself bodily at the front door. He really throws himself too, it's sounds like someone threw a sack of potatoes at the door ITS THAT LOUD! Upon entering our domain he starts to yell, he does that loud also. He expects to be fed and now.

Well today, he didn't get fed and he's pist about it and he doesn't mind telling me so. He's just now calming down, maybe 'cause I got the biggest softest pillow in the house and talked him into laying down on it. Now he's purring and I can hear it from 3 feet away. Enjoy in now sweet Tybalt, Prince of Cats for today you meet with the business end of a scalpel. Hopefully he'll stop peeing on the rug right in front of me now.

So now I imagine that now my 13lb cat will turn in to a 25lb cat and maybe his mother will finally come back home, she's has taken up with the old lady down the street who's cat IS snipped. She doesn't even let her into her house but she still won't come home. She hates her kitten who's much bigger than she is and harasses her pitifully with his little Oedipus complex, I probably wouldn't come home either.

Later I'll tell you all about our Park Adventure yesterday and how pist I am I didn't take my camera to show you all my sweet children on their new bikes, or how my littlest girl is the daredevil of my children.

Sunday, February 17, 2008

It's a beautiful day here in fair Astoria.

But cold as a bitch. So here at the house of Evil we have a big day planned. We intend to haul the kid bikes out of the basement and attach them to the handy dandy new bike rack we bought with the last tiny little bit of our tax money, which I managed to blow in one short weekend...however I am now debt free thank you very much. Then we will take our young daughters to someplace that they can actually ride said bicycles since we live on a hill that is not at good for bike riding.

Last weekend the Daddy took the two girls out to the Jetty in Ft. Stevens State Park to let the oldest girl regain her foothold on the whole "I can ride a bike" portion of her memory and he was going to attach the training wheels from big sister's old bike to little sister's new bike when there was a snag. He, for some reason I'm still not sure of, can't get the training wheels onto the new little bike. So he decides to (and this is why I didn't participate in this particular function, 'cause I go nutty) teach the child to just ride the bike the old fashioned way. Her sister is now gleefully wheeling around the Jetty's giant parking lot only daunted by the speeds of her bike and how to shift them while not pitching forward onto her face.

So after only about 15 minutes if that my eight year old is riding her brand new bike sans any help from the wretched training wheels. How proud was I when her Dad called me to tell me all of this? I almost cried that's how proud! And SHE did pitch forward onto her face but did that stop her? Hell no, she came home with a big Ol' smile like her face had never met pavement before and her shins weren't scuffed at all.

So now I have to go and watch, soon we will all maybe have bicycles and I'll be able to loose the 20lbs I've gained since I quit smoking in August. Not to mention what a nice sappy family activity it will be to go bike riding together at the Park and all that. Ahhhhhhhhh.

Saturday, February 16, 2008

It'a 6am here in fair Astoria and it's still dark

Good morning to you all out there in blog land.
It's Saturday morning here at the House of Evil, The Evil King is on his way to work to drive his Rock-n-Roll fish delivery truck (so named by our eldest daughter who thinks her Dad is the awesomest thing since candy) my two daughters are still tucked away in their beds and I have this glorious free time to blog till my little hearts content, or I go into computer overload whatever.

Now I know for the most part all of you out there in blog land usually take the weekend off.
However here at the House of Evil as per usual our schedule is not per usual. Once again the work schedule is split days off so the Evil King has to work Saturdays just like I did when I was the full time working Parent, now I get the Saturday's off. So I seem to get the Internet all to my self ( Maniacal laugh ensues) what will I do now that I am Queen of the Internet?

First, research a way to take over the world, then gather the minions with instructions to fan out over the world to take their positions and await further instructions for world domination, then maybe I'll start the pot roast, have dinner with the Evil King and the Evil Princesses and then watch a movie, after that maybe I'll take over the world. Can't rule the world on an empty stomach you know.

OH WAIT! I'm Queen of the Internet not Queen of the World! See how fast it can get outa hand? and it only took one paragraph. Now imagine if someone like that was really in control...oh wait.

Anyway, now that I have blathered on about crap no one will ever read I think I'll go now.
I hope you all have fine wonderful weekends filled with lots and lots of whatever it is that you like to do. But please! be reasonable, to much of anything is not good you know?





Friday, February 15, 2008

Goodmorning from the house of EVIL

Well Valentine's turned out to be a big fat surprise, apparently The Evil King spent all day yesterday moping about how he didn't have the money to bring me anything for Valentine's day (what a sweetie pie) then he pulled his Rock-n-Roll fish Delivery Truck into the shop and low and behold his quarterly bonus had arrived much to our surprise. So after all my ranting my wonderful Man brought me flowers and chocolate anyway. Heh...and yes the flowers will die and the chocolate will make me fat, but...he loves me and that's still all that matters. After all this time he is still my Lover, my friend, my favorite boy in the whole wide world and I love him.

So I'll take it when I get it and when I don't I won't cry, I still don't believe all the Holiday commercialism designed to make people feel guilty for not giving or bad for not getting when the reality is that's not what matter's and the original meaning of these silly holidays are lost and people all over have to learn to face reality and live by their means what ever those means are and shame on the media for giving people more reasons to feel bad about themselves.

So Happy Back to Normal Day everybody, have a great friday. I'm going to clean my house, pay some bills, get gas, buy dog food and then have coffee with a girlfriend. It's gonna be a great day!

Thursday, February 14, 2008

Ode to St. Valentine, patron saint of lovers.

It would be nice to say some profound thing on this Valentine's day but I honestly don't have it in me. I'm not an eloquent writer or witty, sometimes funny but mostly not. Also it has been brought to my attention that the true meaning of Valentine's day has been lost as with most American holidays and I just can't bring myself to worship the almighty dollar again so soon after Christmas.
Not to mention the fact that I just can't afford it. I also don't need someone to tell me my day will suck if I don't get the obligatory chocolates and flowers and diamonds. Because chocolate will make you fat the flowers will die (by my hand anyway) and the diamonds? not only can I not afford them where the hell would I where them? Now don't get me wrong, I'm not be-grudging anyone their excuse to have a day a little less ordinary but for me it's just a way of draining my bank account for no real good reason . My relationship with my man will be just as good sans chocolate, flowers and diamonds. Besides the best things from him cannot be purchased and It doesn't have to be a special day to be told how special he thinks I am or how much he loves me and thinks I'm beautiful and sexy and really people after 17 1/2 years isn't that better than all that other crap anyway?
Not to mention this kinda started as a day for the advocation of binding lovers to each other and now its about how much money we spend!
So St. Valentine, nice thought and all but I don't need your ceremony, Thanks anyway!

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

okay heres the deal

My man, my sweet, sweet man who provides for me, takes care of me, keeps a roof over my head and gas in my car and food in my fridge and allows me to be the stay at home mom that I am, well he has been jonesing for the computer much much more than I ever could and since we got this wonderful new gaming computer and he works all day and I don't...I have to wait my stinky little turn and not bitch and whine about it seeing's how I get the machine all to myself tomorrow when there's no one here to stop me. and...he did let me in just now so I could snoop around and write this post and what not. So I'll have to read all your wonderful stuff later and you will all just have to deal with it. Soon I'll be posting more than you can keep up with me. Will update soon.

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

GOOD PEOPLE OF BLOG LAND!!!

I HAVE RETURNED!! not that anyone cares, for I had so few readers before the demise of my sad old computer that they have all forgotten I ever existed and will have to spend the next few weeks harassing my old haunts till they remember who I am. Now that I have a computer that will not crash, $1500 worth of duo core liquid cooled super human (or alien acctually) gamer computer. No more will I be thwarted by the PURGE, jihad my computer will ya, YAHHHH TRICK YAHHHHH. I'm so outa the loop that I don't think I know how to use a computer anymore, I'm a little intimidated. But being the stay at home mom that I am I have lots of time on my hands to figure it out. So, beware, I'm back and on the hunt for my old readers.
See you soon.