A Night at the house of Evil.....

Okay, so my two little girls through such a bazerker rage fit fight with each other that it made me mad enough to worry about what punishment I should deal out as being this angry could cause them discomfort. SO...I put them to bed without dinner for the first time in their shall we say "well fed" lives, NOW! lets get one thing straight, this was their fathers idea, and I thought is was a wonderfull idea as beating them seemed a little harsh considering the mood it put me in, much safer form of punishing Id say and would make them suffer just as much if not MORE than a good spanking (oh I know GASP! shut up) BUT NO! their father is a big giant MARSHMELLOW and caved in, see I made a roast tonight with corn on the cob and big baker baked potatoes, EVEN BETTER! make them smell the roast but not eat, let them hear us eating dinner but not get any themselves. But no, sigh. He fucking caved in, then my daughter the oldest just now walked down the stairs, ney skipped down them with a "Ive never been in trouble in all my life im so innocent" look apon her face. FUCK! if this continues untill she's a teenager IM OUTA HERE!! I will not do the backward slide into hell because of an unruley teen HELL NO! ill go and he can stay and deal with the monsters he has created, AND the little one was allready asleep, he woke her! so much for "wait till your father gets home" there will be none of that. I get to be the harpy then? So be it, but remember you forced me. I am and will remain, THE EVIL QUEEN.

To the little birthday girl whos not so little anymore...

This little girl just turned 7 years old last wednesday, Oh my god how the time does fly by so swiftly, Happy Birthday My little watermelon baby!

I found this today.....

This is me in the 1st grade, and it accured to me how very much my oldest child looks like me. I held it up next to her 1st grade picture and allthough you can tell we are two differant people the resemblance is well scary. And this is also to prove that at one point I WAS a sweet cute little girl, unlike the mean evil woman I have become.

what I did on my summer vacation...

We went to Miss Melanie's house (and I did slap her on the ass! but it was 'cause she let slip that I was available to speak on the phone to someone I didnt feel like speakin' to at the time!) we spent 4 wonderfull days doin' pretty much nothing but letting the kids play, and lo and behold they have reach an age where they do not fight, oh my god it just hit me, I dont think they fought one time the entire time we were there. HEY MELANIE! can you remember a fight between any of the girls while we were there? Has it come to it finally? have our children reached an age finally where they can hash out their differances without incident? there was a time when we couldnt get through a half an hour without having to break up some scuffle or another between two or all of our children, 'cause lets face it when you have 4 girl children between the ages of 4 and 10 things can get a little dramatic and the drop of a hat, hell at the drop of anything. but NOW they are between the ages of 7 and 12 and all is right with the world. GOOD LORD THE YOUNGEST OF THEM IS 7. for the love of god where did the time go. Im gonna blink and there all gonna be callin' me from their own houses telling me what they did that weekend, and far be it from me to rush things but BRING IT! I am so ready to be a selfish woman again with no real care in the world but what I WILL BE WEARING today. not that I dont love my children and my nieces but I am innately selfish and had it not been for their father who begged I probably would have never had children. But while I have them its nice to be able to take them to someone else who is in the same boat and just let them all be little girls. So thanks Melanie, for letting me descend apon you with my loud little blondies and for dealing with the ever dreaded birthday party with me (the source of all Mother's exaustion, the B-Day party) Thank you for being my very best friend so I can do things like spring on you a new futon mattress for your poor sad little mattressless futon frame so as to cease to cause a health hazard in your living room. For letting me witness your totally awesome feline and his incredible freak out show. For being such a good sport when my stupid sweetheart pulled out his fucking hallmark card and had your MIL sign the R.S.V.P and happily invited her into your presence where you could not without causing major trouble extricate your self from the situation (ps I believe he did it on purpose now fucking ass) leave it to the men to make sure THEY arent uncomfortable in any situation even if it means forcing their women to PRETEND to be nice and not angry. thank you thank you thank you. I had a fab-u-lous time. And! now its your turn. you need to come see me now. The weathers beautifull, the water has that summer ocean smell to it that will stop you dead and find you sniffing the air like you have never breathed untill just that moment. and heres the clincher, it cools off at night, and it starts off cool in the morning, and we need more pictures of the girls driving the water bound machine of doom. so thats what I did on my big vacation. stay tuned theres still 6 weeks of summer left before school starts and I have one more KID B-Day to celebrate (good times!)

aaaaaaaaaaaaand we're off!

Okay, so were pack to the roof on account a I got Miss Melanie in Orygun something she really needs and since I perpetuated the need I suppose Ill have to rectify her problem, however she has no Idea what it is and so I wont ruin the surprise by anouncing it here. BUT will have her fill all you's in when we's get there. So we're on our way out of town as on NOW! one quick stop and the fillem up station and away to P-town we go. And hey Kevin! I promise to give her a good healthy swat on the ass for ya this time! kisses ;)

Im losin' my mind

I just realized that its been well longer than I can remember since Ive had any time to myself. I go to work and I deal with disgruntled customers and disgruntled employees, then I come home and I deal with disgruntled children then I get up and start all over again. I need a drink.

Its an aniversary....

Im not sure of the exact date of this picture so we'll just call it a summer aniversary, and I know I said at one point that we were never married but I guess I fibbed 'cause I looked up on my wall and spotted this, it was taken about 13 years ago this month. We met about 3 years before that, I must note that while the church is no more Alex and I still endure. Happy Aniversary Alex!

Just in case....

your children are whining about doing the chores whilst on their summer vacation.....

Ever have one of those days?

Or weeks rather, when your completley irratated? people irratate me. Everywhere I go theres some rude asshole waiting to irrate me. Yesterday at work I had a lady call me about her furniture delivery, now this women is getting an exchange for her merchandise so she is fully aware that her delivery will be sometime between 12 noon and 6pm. Our warehouse calls these people and gives them a 4 hour window for there delivery (legally we have to) now Im at work on one of the most beutifull days this summer and Im working ALONE, when she calls to bitch (real loud) "you mean I am expected to be held captive in my house all day waiting for YOU PEOPLE! my children want to go to the RIVER! I felt like saying "you know, your welcome to free up your day by bringing your lazy ass down here and picking this shit up yourself, then you dont have to wait for US PEOPLE to bring you your shit. But I cant say that. I dont know about you all but when I have a delivery, when I pay for something that I want and PAY for it to be delivered I will wait, Ill wait all day, HELL the cable guy gives you a window OF all day, "between 8 and 5 ma'am, thats the best I can tell you." What is with people? do they think its okay to treat people this way? never in my life have I called a business up and been that rude to them. Then she went on to say, "I want you to get ahold of your men and narrow that window down, I have a life you know!" Now, Ive been irrated for more than a week at this point, what I want to say is "BITCH if your life is so important why did you agree to be at home for your fucking delivery that youve been harrassing me for a week over?" why did you call me everyday to yell at me that your merchandise was taking a WHOLE WEEK to arrive? Let me tell you something lady, I have people who have been waiting for there furniture to arrive from FUCKING CHINA for months and you want to bitch about a week? WTF? If shopping is so damn frustrating and enprisoned like for you then why dont you find another hobby, hmmm? Normal people are so happy that there new furnishings are to arrive that day that they'll happily stay home to wait. And those who dont want to wait all day? they PICK IT UP!!! 'cause really the price of renting a u-haul to pick up your shit is cheaper than the wopping $75 it takes for delivery. The only problen with that? They have to haul their OWN shit into there house. You know some people are just unhappy all the time and its these people who make it a point to spread their misery to others, 'cause you know it loves the company. I just have one thing to say....THANKS!, thanks a whole fuckin' bunch. You suck!

Okay dont laugh...

Call me a vidiot, but, Its a sad sad day in vidiot land my friends. Aaron Spelling has passed on. YES FOLKS Donna Martin's daddy has died so sayeth the kids over at GFY. I was not immune to the lure of 90210 and Melrose. Even as a child I would secretly be disappointed when a family member would rather watch golf then the great Dynasty (see the nasty in that?) or Dallas (Oh J.R., your great creator has gone) I think anyone who loved him or his work openly or in secret should give a second to pay homage to the man who brought the trash romance novel to the boob-tube. A great era has ended and for this I am sad.

realizing your old.

I went to a baby shower today and if you scroll down you will see the belly of the quest of honor. What I realized while at said shower is that im old. I looked around me and Im sitting with all the women that are my age or older and that all the "girls" are in with the mother to-be who is barely more than a babe herself. What accured to me as I sat there is that I was more comfortable where I was and that I had no real desire to go in and sit with all the 20 something's in and around the new mommy. Even if it meant that I could impart some of my wisdom (heh) on these girls who are searching for lifes instructions. Heres the thing though, maybe I want to be old, let me explain. When I was a young 20 something girl I would look longingly at groups like I was in this evening and think to myself, "man, wouldnt it be cool to be that cool.?" now not tooting my own here or anything but it does come down to this, I feel more comfortable and at ease because I am more comfortable and at ease, I no longer have to try to be all sexy and pretty and cute. I am a mother with a husband and short people to look after and to sit around with other "women" who are in the same boat and just take a good long relaxing deep breath, It acctually feels like ive caught my breath for a change. So call it old or call it settled but its nice not to be the mother to be, or the mom with the little babies. Also seeing three ( yes, folks THREE) pregos in the same room (there were supposed to be 4 but one popped last night) it made me very glad I am no longer capable of child bearing. Ill leave that to the 20 somethings.

Ten things I hate...

First and formost
1. I hate stupid people.
2. I hate it when customers walk into my store at 5 min to close and shop till they buy nothing for 45 min. People the overtime is NOT that great.
3. I hate it when my bra strap snaps.
4. I REALLY hate pulling out something to wear that I love and discovering that TODAY it looks and feels (very important) like shit on.
5. I hate the word BUT. me: go pick up your coat off the floor, 9 goin on 19: BUT, BUT WHY?
6. I hate most men between the ages of 18 and 22, it should be manditory for them to spend these years on an Island unto themselves far far from everyone.
7. I hate a few assorted body parts, which for humility sake I will not name here.
8. I hate my job.
9. I hate to be cold
and this ones the big one,
10. I hate HATE HATE HATE...(hate) housework.

Off to the greater P-Town area...

well folks, its off to the big city for us here Astoria hick folk, pacen up the dog and the kids and headin' out. See ya'.

5 hours at the E.R.

Well, today my littlest girl was so wracked with tummy pain that I took her to the emergency room. After fives exausting hours they really dont know whats wrong, they think its a urinary tract infection and there positive its not appendisitice. But they wont know if its a UTI untill the test results come back tomorrow, so they gave me some scripts for some anitbiotics which I wont be administering untill they are SURE its a UTI. not givin' my kid medicine if she doesnt need it. And they also gave me a script for a fool-proof stool softener in case its just a really bad case of constipation. All of these problems could possibly lead to the vomiting which she also started to do again today. This does not however strengthen my faith in the medical profession when 3 doctors of different fields could not come up with a solid answer after a fucking cat scan. Anyway, now that im home which was also in question as they himmed and hawed over whether to keep her over night for oberservation I find that I am completley exausted and cannot sleep. Must be the worrying. The little one is however sleeping soundly now and I have to wonder if my first instinct was correct and she just has a stomach bug that she managed to re-infect herself with because I failed to get all of the water bottles she drank off of the first time out of her sight. When the guys with the degrees cant figure it out I have to wonder if, as a mother, im ultimatley more qualified as a pediatrician then the professionals.

Happy Father's Day to my favorite boy in the whole wide world...

See that right there, That man asked me to have that baby. And Im so glad I did, they say a picture is worth a thousand words and this one is. I coulndt say anything as beautifull as I think this picture is, Thank you my lover, my friend and my soul mate. You have given me everything. Happy Fathers Day Alexander,
I Love You.

The last day

Its the end of the school year people, I am so pleased that I get to sleep in an hour for the next three months, then maybe Ill be out of this hell job and can sleep all day after the kids are back in school. And, I might. Untill I get all caught up on said sleep. My littlest girl will be attending school today. She is all better, a little sore in the tummy but she woke with a smile this morning and managed to eat a banana and some milk without cluching her gut and sayin' "momma, my tummy hurts" So all is well and the kids are almost off to school, I have one more to drop at the bus stop and then Im free. And so are they. P.S. Miss Melanie, in answer to your post about boring bloggers...not so boring. My life IS boring at the home front its the work front that irritating and comical and blog worthy but I really cant blog about that yet. SOOOOOO for now its the mundane home life ya'll git.
Happy last day of school!!! anyone else getting set free of the institution today? ;}

SICK, SICK, SICK...

I have a very sick little girl. She has been throwin' up all week, and, its the last week of school. Poor little thing. The best part of being in school too! the very last week is always the most fun. AND now the man has it too. If im lucky ill get through the week without catching it also. Im very carefull not to drink out of their water glasses, not to kiss them on the mouth, to bleach anything that they may have touched that may come in contact with MY mouth or any other part of me. I mean CRAP I cant get sick, I have to work damnit. So far the demon virus has stayed clear of me, I think it knows that I might do something drastic if its decides to take up residence anywhere in or around me, I have bleach and Im not afraid to use it!! Either that or my allergies are so bad (and they are) that nothing can get past it and when it does I sneeze it out so fast it cant take root. Not to mention that my home remedy involves some strong whiskey and since my man quit drinking 3 months ago so did I, now Im not sure what ill do if I get ill. SO on that note, after three days my girl is starting to feel a little better but still not good enough to attend school today, anyone out there got a good flu remedy they'd like to share with a tired mother of a sick 6 year old? I would really love it if she could attend the last day of school? Anyone?

Lacey and her belly bauble...

Okay this is for all of you ladies who are worried about what will happen to your belly-button piercing's while you are pregnant...so, this is Lacey's belly. Lacey is my office clerk who will be having little Kylie Yavonne sometime mid-august. and look it! she can still wear her pretty little belly bauble. So, prego's spruce up that belly and show it off. You too can be a belly bauble wearer.

Here she is folks...isnt she pretty.

In all her splendor and glory the sweet little thing acctually stopped and posed for me.
HA HA Miss Melanie! Neener